I recently listened to Malcolm Gladwell’s book “Blink: The Power of Thinking Without Thinking.” It was a fascinating book, and like “Outliers” contained many fascinating stories and ideas. The premise of the book is that we should learn to value and strengthen our unconscious abilities to make decisions. To trust our “gut” more. He explored countless scenery where people made better decisions before they started logically working through the problem. To me the book made complete sense, as I have a strong believe in the gift of the Holy Ghost and his role in leading and inspiring us. However, by nature I feel a real need to “think things through.” The book encouraged me to trust my inner feelings more.

Gladwell also talked about how the words we surround ourselves with and the emotions we express have an impact an our actions and feelings. For example, in one study, people were brought in for what they perceived to be an English test. Six to seven sentences were given in scrambled order. ie. man walked street the old across. In each set one of the words of each sentence would describe something such as old age or charity. The test revealed that test takers that listened to the sentences about old age walked much slower after wards to the table where they submitted their results, and the attendants who heard the sentences with words synanomous with charity, were much more patient with the intentionally occupied attendant at the desk. None of the attendants were aware that their sentences had all included words about say youth, or selfishness on a conscience level, but somehow their subconscious had made the connection and it had influenced their conduct.

Another chapter talked about a scientist, Dr. Paul Ekman, who studies microexpressions- a real life Dr. Lightman from “Lie to Me.” As him and his assistant were trying to master the expressions for sadness and anger they realized that though they were just acting out the expressions, the mere act of making those expressions was influencing their emotions. They were both feeling depressed and upset. The week I listened to this book I was also attending several rehearsals for the opera “Pagliacci.” Every night in rehearsal I would “pretend” to witness two murders. I would return home feeling deplete and unmotivated. Tom often mentioned how tired and low I seemed, and I just assumed it was the late hour. However, after listening to this I immediately realized that I was experiencing much more than fatigue- but a little bit of the grief and disgust that any rational person would feel after witnessing a killing. Maybe this is why actors are so crazy!

The third chapter that intrigued me was one that talked about John Gottman, a scientist in Seattle who through his study has developed an ability to to determine the likelihood of a marriage lasting more than seven years. Just by listening to a fifteen minute conversation between them he can predict with 95% accuracy if their marriage will last. Gottman found the biggest indicator of a probable unsuccessful marriage was the presence of contempt. When one or both of the partners showed signs of thinking “I know better,” “You’re ideas are stupid” or “You don’t know what you’re talking about,” statistics show that their marriage was much more likely to end early. Even if the partner never actually voiced those thoughts, but rather expressed them in other ways. While I don’t think we should all go running to Gottman’s office to have our marriages “checked out.” It did make me think about the communication in my marriage and how essential it is to constantly work on seeking understanding first, and respecting Tom’s opinions and ideas. Feelings that I may think I am “hiding” are likely more apparent than I realize. The challenge is to rid myself of those feelings. If I am feeling superior to someone, I probably just need to get to know that person better- or spend more time analyzing my own weaknesses.

While I don’t think Blink represents hard facts, it does propose many ideas worth considering and thinking about. It made me think about an experience I had with our electrician. When he came to give his bid, I had a bad feeling about him. I really didn’t want to use him, but my logical side convinced me that I was just being racist. So we went with him. It ended up being a very bad choice. Obviously, I could site other examples when my first impressions were also very wrong. I think that’s where prayer comes in.

I highly recommend the book “Blink,” if only so we can have a lively conversation about it!