Changing perspectives

obnoxious- curious
over-active- energetic, lively
chatterbox- social
poorly dressed- independent
pompous- confident
misbehavior- misunderstood
I’ve been surprised at how changing my view of some of Scotland’s behaviors/characteristics can completely alter my feelings towards him. Words are powerful. When I see Scotland’s endless questions as innocent curiosity, a thirst for knowledge, a sign that I am raising a confident child, I am happy to answer each succeeding question. Too often I wave them off as him being annoying, demanding, disrespectful when that’s not the spirit in which they were issued. And likewise, even if they were delivered in such way, when I ignore that behavior and instead treat him as if he was being sincere, he usually becomes as such. I’ve been trying to treat Scotland more like I would if he were an adult. That means not demanding that he drop everything and do what I say, when I say it, but instead respecting that he was doing something he deemed valuable and that I should instead say “When you’re done with X, will you please do Y?” (It’s shocking how much more quickly he responds when I ask like this.) Interestingly, in my pursuit of treating him with more respect, it has been easier for me to require him to treat me with more respect- and he has been much more willing to do it. Funny how we treat children as lesser beings, and then punish them when they act like it. Scary how closely our children mirror our own behavior.

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2 responses to “Changing perspectives”

    • The longer I mother, and it hasn’t been that long, the more I am in awe that mothering isn’t a degree in college. Imagine the required courses! It would most certainly require a heavy load of psychology.

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